When it's Sunday Again

 

Every week I face the same thing.

I start the work week on a Monday morning. I'm usually bleary eyed and hating everything, but some part of me is excited for the week ahead. What will I accomplish this week?

The week goes along - usually - just fine and normal. By Friday, I practically RUN home, excited to see my husband and daughter and to start a weekend full of possibilities. While we are usually busy on the weekends, having all of the time to spend with Penelope is a blessing. I really cherish my weekends so that I can just hang out with her and have more than my usual 1.5 hours/day with her that the weekdays offer (--->I know, it sucks).

Here's the thing: the weekdays are rough. I'm sure other Moms, whether working or not, can relate. I work full time and that means that I have Penelope and myself up, dressed, ready for the day and out of our apartment by 7:45 each morning. I rush to get her to daycare, rush to the Path, rush to the office (and am still usually late), rush home as soon as the 6:00 bell rings and then it's a rush to get every possible moment with her until her bedtime at 8:00. This includes dinner clean up, helping Shaun with our dinner prep, Penelope's bath time, couch snuggles and her bedtime routine, all within the span of 1 hour and 10 minutes. It's never enough time with Penelope. Ever. And sometimes I cry when it's 8:30 and past her bedtime and she wants to stay up even longer and I want her to stay up, but it's a Monday and in the end, that's just a bad idea for everyone.

So the weekends feel so carefree. Like I can just be with my daughter. I can be her caregiver and reconnect with her and just be Mommy, without rushing around to school and work and answering after-hours emails. And though admittedly there are moments when I'm guiltily excited for the carefree nature of another kind when Monday rolls around, I love my uninterrupted weekends with my child.

Then Sunday rolls around. I love Sundays. I like making a priority of resting on Sundays...getting ready for the week, lingering on the couch a little longer, taking a trip to the park and making a nice Sunday dinner. But when the late afternoon hits, the anxiety of the week ahead begins to creep up on me. At first like a lightweight blanket, it starts at my feet and works its way up to a heavy down comforter enveloping my entire body well into the late evening hours. I know that Monday = leave Penelope day.

The thought of that keeps me up until way past my bedtime on Sunday nights. I just had such a nice weekend and I don't want it to end! I'm sure most people feel like this generally on Sundays anyway, whether you have kids or not, but adding in 'leaving child at daycare for the next 9 hours' just makes it really, really tough. Lately, it's been plaguing me more than usual.

I haven't found a solution yet. It's typically the one night during the week when Shaun falls asleep before me and I end up in a serious Instagram stalking/back post binge while the clock ticks away. Perhaps next week, I'll try some chamomile tea. Does that actually work for anyone? As I lie awake well past midnight on Sunday, willing myself to go to sleep, I thought this would be a great topic for today. So please leave your own Sunday night experiences in the comments! Let's start a support group :)

So parents, what do you think? Am I alone in my Sunday night anxiety? How do you deal with leaving your kiddos each day for work?

 

Also: a day in the life, when being a working parent kinda sucks, and a sick day in the life